War and More War, by Tolstoy
Duke of the Bangle, by JRR Tolkien
Bridge Going The Other Way Over The River Kwai, by Pierre Bouille.
Knitting Circle, by Chuck Palahunik
Friday, March 20, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
Random Doobings
And so it came to pass in the house of Doobie/Slim that Goodtime Slim didst awaken one morning, lo, and he didst remove himself hence to the loungeroom where he did espy Captain Doobie peering intently through an empty toilet roll.
"What the fuck are you doing now?" He didst spake.
And verily didst Captain Doobie reply, "This is my dickhead telescope."
And Goodtime Slim was filled not with mirth but with great sadness, and he did say unto Captain Doobie, "For fuck's sake."
Whereupon Captain Doobie didst commence to peer upon the countenance of Goodtime Slim, announcing "Yes! It's working perfectly!"
And it came to pass that Goodtime Slim waxed wroth and took the Dickhead Telescope from Captain Doobie, peering through it himself unto the other's visage, declaring, "Yes, it fucking is, isn't it?"
Here endeth the lesson. Amen.
"What the fuck are you doing now?" He didst spake.
And verily didst Captain Doobie reply, "This is my dickhead telescope."
And Goodtime Slim was filled not with mirth but with great sadness, and he did say unto Captain Doobie, "For fuck's sake."
Whereupon Captain Doobie didst commence to peer upon the countenance of Goodtime Slim, announcing "Yes! It's working perfectly!"
And it came to pass that Goodtime Slim waxed wroth and took the Dickhead Telescope from Captain Doobie, peering through it himself unto the other's visage, declaring, "Yes, it fucking is, isn't it?"
Here endeth the lesson. Amen.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
The Credible Hulk
"Don't make me pedantic.
You wouldn't like me when i'm pedantic."
Dr David Banner, librarian, grammarist, searching for a way to tap into the hidden literacy that all humans have. One night, working alone in his lab he is subjected to an accidental overdose of grammar radiation. Now, whenever Dr Banner hears incorrect usage of the English language a startling transformation occurs. The creature is driven by pedantry, and pursued by an investigative reporter. The creature is wanted for a dangling participle it did not commit. David Banner is believed to be dead, and must let the world believe that he is dead until he can learn to quell the raging beast that resides within him.
He is: The Credible Hulk.
You wouldn't like me when i'm pedantic."
Dr David Banner, librarian, grammarist, searching for a way to tap into the hidden literacy that all humans have. One night, working alone in his lab he is subjected to an accidental overdose of grammar radiation. Now, whenever Dr Banner hears incorrect usage of the English language a startling transformation occurs. The creature is driven by pedantry, and pursued by an investigative reporter. The creature is wanted for a dangling participle it did not commit. David Banner is believed to be dead, and must let the world believe that he is dead until he can learn to quell the raging beast that resides within him.
He is: The Credible Hulk.
Saturday, March 07, 2009
A Geological Report On The Music of Boney M.
When one thinks of the 1970's harmony supergroup Boney M, one generally thinks of peppy, upbeat disco music. However, lyrically the band who sang such hits as 'Daddy Cool', 'Rasputin' and 'Painter Man' also displayed a remarkble propensity for geology. For example:
"Sunny", arguably the band's biggest hit, is quite specific in this regard. The lyric couplet 'My life was tossed like the wind-blown sand/and the rock was formed when you held my hand' can refer to nothing less than the formation of basalt through surface vulcanisation. I say basalt only with the caveat that the song does not specifically mention pressure of any kind being applied during the process of vitrification, which would result in the formation of crystalline or crypto-crystalline substances being formed (dependant upon the pressures involved and the time period allowed for the process overall). It is also possible where vulcanisation is concerned that the rock may have been pumice, this being the aereated form of basalt.
"Brown Girl In The Ring" does not specifically mention any types of rock but rather a geologic process. The line "cuttin' a way to wash my clothes" may refer to either the forces of glaciation or erosion on soils and substrates, in this case specifically to form a river valley or bed suitable for use as a primitive laundry facilty.
"Rasputin", nominally about the Mad Monk of Czarist Russia, contains the lyric "he wanted Russian land but never mind the Czar/but the Kozakchak he was really wunderbar" clearly refers to the desire for the acquisition in the early 1900s of large tracts of Russian real estate. This would have been an astute move for Rasputin geologically, as the initial years of the 20th century saw some of the richest mining activity in Russia's history. Alexandrite (the Russian national stone named after the Czar himself) was being mined in the Ural Mountains, and several kimberlite formations were discovered in Sibera (home to the Kozakchak) which would go on to yield 1/3 of the world's total diamond production.
"Sunny", arguably the band's biggest hit, is quite specific in this regard. The lyric couplet 'My life was tossed like the wind-blown sand/and the rock was formed when you held my hand' can refer to nothing less than the formation of basalt through surface vulcanisation. I say basalt only with the caveat that the song does not specifically mention pressure of any kind being applied during the process of vitrification, which would result in the formation of crystalline or crypto-crystalline substances being formed (dependant upon the pressures involved and the time period allowed for the process overall). It is also possible where vulcanisation is concerned that the rock may have been pumice, this being the aereated form of basalt.
"Brown Girl In The Ring" does not specifically mention any types of rock but rather a geologic process. The line "cuttin' a way to wash my clothes" may refer to either the forces of glaciation or erosion on soils and substrates, in this case specifically to form a river valley or bed suitable for use as a primitive laundry facilty.
"Rasputin", nominally about the Mad Monk of Czarist Russia, contains the lyric "he wanted Russian land but never mind the Czar/but the Kozakchak he was really wunderbar" clearly refers to the desire for the acquisition in the early 1900s of large tracts of Russian real estate. This would have been an astute move for Rasputin geologically, as the initial years of the 20th century saw some of the richest mining activity in Russia's history. Alexandrite (the Russian national stone named after the Czar himself) was being mined in the Ural Mountains, and several kimberlite formations were discovered in Sibera (home to the Kozakchak) which would go on to yield 1/3 of the world's total diamond production.
Thursday, March 05, 2009
The Force Delusion
Professor Richard Dawkins, holder of the Charles Simyoni Chair for the Understanding Of Science, has seen fit to assail all and sundry with his non-belief in his new book, 'The Force Delusion'.
In his book Dawkins seems to miss the essential point of belief in The Force; that is, that the existance of The Force is essentially unproveable, and has been proven many, many times over.
While it is true that none of the known facts about The Force can ever really be known, those that are known are irrefutable. If we look at the source material, "Star Wars Episode 4: From The Adventures of Luke Skywalker" we find a great many of these things inside. Indeed, in reading TFD, one finds oneself wondering if Dawkins has even ever read SWE4:FTAoLS!
In maintaining his skepticism in the face of unknowable imponderables, Dawkins casts himself in the mould of a fundamentalist of the worst kind, demanding 'facts' when the balm of knowledge is all around him, surrounding him and binding him, if he would only open his mind.
Dawkins would do well to remember that not only is his rational skepticism completely irrational, but that in identifying himself as an unbeliever he allies himself with those oppresive regimes of the galaxy whose members also advocated aforceism: Darths Malak, Revan, Palpatine and Caedus all spring to mind, not to mention Exar Kun and Karness Muur.
Most unsettling of all is Dawkin's assertion that teaching a belief in the Force in young children is child abuse. Mr Dawkins, the Jedi Order does not kidnap children, we merely forcibly seperate them from their parents at birth and raise them in a communal environment to have no knowledge of their former life. To call this behaviour abuse is surely overreacting to a huge degree.
In short, Professor Dawkins' new book has the smack of fundamentalism about it. I'm not accusing him of destoying planets with a space-based superlaser, but if the shoe fits Mr Dawkins, then wear it.
In his book Dawkins seems to miss the essential point of belief in The Force; that is, that the existance of The Force is essentially unproveable, and has been proven many, many times over.
While it is true that none of the known facts about The Force can ever really be known, those that are known are irrefutable. If we look at the source material, "Star Wars Episode 4: From The Adventures of Luke Skywalker" we find a great many of these things inside. Indeed, in reading TFD, one finds oneself wondering if Dawkins has even ever read SWE4:FTAoLS!
In maintaining his skepticism in the face of unknowable imponderables, Dawkins casts himself in the mould of a fundamentalist of the worst kind, demanding 'facts' when the balm of knowledge is all around him, surrounding him and binding him, if he would only open his mind.
Dawkins would do well to remember that not only is his rational skepticism completely irrational, but that in identifying himself as an unbeliever he allies himself with those oppresive regimes of the galaxy whose members also advocated aforceism: Darths Malak, Revan, Palpatine and Caedus all spring to mind, not to mention Exar Kun and Karness Muur.
Most unsettling of all is Dawkin's assertion that teaching a belief in the Force in young children is child abuse. Mr Dawkins, the Jedi Order does not kidnap children, we merely forcibly seperate them from their parents at birth and raise them in a communal environment to have no knowledge of their former life. To call this behaviour abuse is surely overreacting to a huge degree.
In short, Professor Dawkins' new book has the smack of fundamentalism about it. I'm not accusing him of destoying planets with a space-based superlaser, but if the shoe fits Mr Dawkins, then wear it.
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