A Very Special Friday the 13th Random Doobing.

Usually, Friday the 13^th was spent in the Doobie/Slim household in mutual low-key antagonism. This really was their own fault. Goodtime Slim’s utter cowardice caused the normally happy-go-lucky Captain Doobie to transform into the world’s largest sceptic. Hence, Goodtime Slim came to loathe Friday the 13^th whenever it came around. It would start with Goodtime Slim throwing a pinch of salt over his shoulder and would end with Captain Doobie threatening to smash the bathroom cabinet mirror with a hammer unless Goodtime Slim made dinner for the next two weeks.

This time, however, Goodtime Slim had vowed that Captain Doobie must pay. Last night, after Captain Doobie had fallen asleep during a carefully selected DVD of Hey Dad and a glass of Horlicks, Goodtime Slim had started work. Now, at 10am on Friday the 13^th, it was ready. Goodtime Slim settled himself behind the sofa where he could see Captain Doobie still happily snoring away in his lounge chair. Goodtime Slim readied his bullhorn, then yelled into it: “WAKE UP! FIRE! NUCULAR SPLOSION! LANDSLIDE! UNEXPECTED ABBA REUNION TOUR! DANGER! DANGER!”

The response was immediate. Captain Doobie, terrified beyond words that the Swedish singing sensations might be returning to the Southern Hemisphere at some point, leapt out of his chair. In doing so his head went straight through the mirror that Goodtime Slim had placed horizontally above him. He screamed, ducked and rolled to the left, straight under the ladder that Goodtime Slim had placed against the wall. After that, Goodtime Slim turned on the hose, causing Captain Doobie to instinctively grab the umbrella and open it inside, to cover himself from the ice-cold jet. The water startled the 6 black cats hiding under the other lounge chair and they rocketed past Captain Doobie to freedom out the open window. Sensing an opportunity, Captain Doobie dived out the window, head first into a cannon, which immediately fired him over the house and into a child’s wading pool full of hottish tar which Goodtime Slim had prepared earlier. As Captain Doobie stood up and tried to scrape off the clinging black mess, Goodtime Slim pulled the string which released the feathers from a bag above the wading pool, which floated down, settled on the tar and stuck fast. Job done, Goodtime Slim then walked into the house, shut the window, smiled, and locked the door.