ELIZABETH: Car maker Holden has today admitted that its entire output since 1948 has been an April Fool's Day joke gone horribly, horribly wrong.
Whichever Seppo is currently the chairman of Holden admitted in a press conference held today that General Motors had originally been contacted by the Chifley government in 1947 to begin work on an April Fools Day prank for the upcoming year. Unfortunately, due to the post-war lack of irony in the Australian economy, lower-echelons of General Motors staff had interpreted the memo calling for local production literally, and while no-one was looking a factory was transplanted from Detroit to produce the last-year's Buick.
"It appears to have been a paperwork error initially," the anonymous-faced American lazily drawled, "then several of the office wags began to make quite an effort to ensure that no-one found out. In the end, they managed to keep it going for 61 years."
The error was only discovered when a filing cabinet was moved in GM's Dearborn global HQ, revealing a small door which enabled people to enter Larry Perkins' head for a period of 15 minutes.
Industry writers have expressed amazement at the magnitude of the prank. "I was totally fooled," commented Ged Bulmer, Editor of Wheels Magazine, "I mean, I know that their output since 1978 has been completely pissweak, but I thought it was just a temporary slump they were going through." Toyota CEO Konnichiwa Ohigazamus expressed similar concerns, noting however that "with the benefit of foresight it explains the VN, doesn't it?"
Ford executives were unavailable for comment, and all efforts to reach them on the 13 1/2 floor of the Geelong plant have so far met with failure.
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