MIscellaneous limericks

A Transylvanian Count known as Dracula,
Composed several limericks spectacular,
Said he, “They’re all fine
But to make them all rhyme,
I have to use most uncommon vernacular.”

By far the worst circus on earth,
Was the one which was once held in Perth,
The crowd sat and glowered,
While a goat was deflowered,
By a man of considerable girth.

A sermon on things anatomical,
Delivered in tones most un-canonical,
Made the deacon declare,
“You, the young vicar there!
Keep it above the lower abdominal!”